Your spiritual energy is a valuable resource and not easy to replace but how can you tell if your client is an energy vampire? Read on to find out how to preserve your energy.
Have you spent time with someone, however brief, but when you leave you feel drained while they walk away happy with the world and loving life? Then you’ve just had a run-in with an energy vampire.
“An energy vampire can never steal energy from us unless we consciously or unconsciously permit them to” - Mateo Sol
When you leave your home you lock your front door, you lock your car, you even close your bag if you're outside. So it should be no surprise that your energy needs guarding just as closely. Especially because physical possessions are much easier to replace than your energy.
WHAT IS AN ENERGY VAMPIRE?
An energy vampire is a person who leaves you feeling emotionally drained. They’re likely to gravitate towards anyone who will lend their support. Empaths should be extra vigilant because of their sensitive and compassionate nature. These vampires haven’t done the inner work, which is depleting their emotional energy, meaning they need to recharge from others. They’re unlikely to be aware of the damage they’re causing. This behaviour is a soul crying for help.
“They feed on your good, loving and compassionate energy. They make you feel guilty as if you’re never giving enough” - Christiane Northrup
TYPES OF ENERGY VAMPIRE
Here are the most common types of vampires you’re likely to meet when working with clients:
The emotional blackmailer - These vampires shower you with compliments and possibly gifts too. They make you feel good about yourself and the work you're doing with them. It feels like they’re the ideal client. However, over time they’ll expect gratitude through your time and energy. They were probably unloved in childhood and are making up for it now.
The flatterer - You’re happy and successful, which is something this vampire envies. They always pay you compliments even though they’re jealous of your success. They thrive while drawing positive energy from you. If things start to go badly for you, this vampire will leave you on your own and likely gossip about you behind your back.
The green-eyed monster - Again this vampire is jealous of your success. A common theme with vampires - because they haven’t dealt with their own problems. However, instead of saying nice things they'll give you loaded comments that leave you feeling attacked. They’re trying to push you off balance and seeing you fall makes them feel better. This is the person that would take you out for drinks just so you feel terrible the next day.
The peacock - At first you love their energy. Being around them lifts you up. You look up to them, telling them how great they are and how you wish you were more like them. With time you realise they only talk about themselves and you’re only around to provide them with a stream of compliments. Are their boasts even true?
The chatterbox - Do you ever feel like you’re being talked at rather than having a conversation with someone? That’s this vampire. They talk and talk…and talk. Paying attention to that many words is obviously going to be exhausting. And the words are unlikely to change your world. The problem is closing off the conversation is really difficult. If you’ve ever said goodbye to someone but each time they think of yet another thing that they want to talk about then you’ve probably already had to deal with this kind of vampire.
The grey mouse - So humble. Surely someone like this can’t be a vampire? On the surface they’re quiet and harmless however they’re so quiet you have to give them a disproportionate amount of attention just to listen to what they’re saying. Once they see you’re making an effort they have you in their trap and you’ll begin to realise they only speak about melancholy topics. This vampire never smiles or laughs fully!
The firework - You have no idea how this vampire is going to react or respond. But they will make you feel like you’re walking on eggshells because they’re likely to explode with rage at a moment's notice. In order to keep them calm you act fearfully, doing your best to not aggravate them. However, they pick up on your energy and know they have you in their trap. It makes them feel you’re under their control.
Look but don’t touch - Provocative clothing? Flirty behaviour? This vampire wants your attention. It doesn’t matter if you give them compliments or speak badly of them, it’s all the same to them as they just want your attention. The more time you spend talking about them the more of your energy they’ve taken.
NB. These are main types highlighted by acclaimed energy healer, Alla Svirinkaya. But if you'd like to delve deeper, we recommend her book 'Own Your Energy' to discover more.
HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF FROM ENERGY VAMPIRES?
In the same way, you have an immune system for fighting colds you also have an energy defence system for fighting off energy vampires. When you’re feeling tired, stressed or low your defences will be down so here’s some tips to keep you protected.
Keep direct eye contact to a minimum. The eyes are the window to the soul.
Your solar plexus, your 3rd chakra, is the centre of social interaction. Keep this covered or create space by moving behind a chair or sofa. Folding your arms or holding an object like a cushion can help.
Crystals have great powers of protection. Surround yourself with any or all of the following crystals, or wear them so they hang over your solar plexus for maximum effect - Black Tourmaline, Labradorite, Jet, Black Obsidian, Fluorite, Tourmalated Quartz, Smokey Quartz, Hematite, Tigers Eye or Lapis Lazuli.
The healing power of water is strong so take a shower. Don’t get back into the same clothes but find fresh loose clothes to put on after washing to allow your aura to flow.
Light a long match. While focusing on the flame, hold an intention to release you from this energy vampire. Blow out the match with a long “ahhhhh” to clear the air in your lungs and throw away the match immediately.
PROBLEMS WITH THIS KIND OF CLIENT RELATIONSHIP
If you have a client who’s an energy vampire, this obviously brings an extra dimension to your relationship because they’re paying for your time. In a way, they’re paying for your energy. But if they’re not invested in doing the inner work themselves you’ll be undermining your boundaries and carrying them. One question you need to ask yourself is, have you attracted this person into your life? Are they trying to highlight something you need to address?
ARE YOU AN ENERGY VAMPIRE?
This is a question no one wants to ask themselves. But don’t worry, everyone can be and is an energy vampire at some point. Even if it’s only because you’re having a bad day and need to vent. Have you ever had a cold and felt sorry for yourself? Have you gossiped about someone? These actions can be draining for others, but fortunately when it’s only for brief periods, it’s sure to be forgiven and forgotten.
Now you know how to identify an energy vampire and how to protect yourself from one. The good news is they’re not maliciously stealing your energy, they just need to do some shadow work. It’s important to remember you might have drawn them into your life because of how you feel about yourself. Finally, energy vampires are the only ones who can change themselves. The work has to be done by them.
Now you know what to look for, you’re in a much better position to discern the right clients to work with and enjoy your meetings, safe in the knowledge of how to protect yourself if you do come across a pesky energy vampire!
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